Conciliar Sect’s Scatological Listicle Profanes Communion of Saints
The Pillar, a digital organ of the conciliar sect occupying the Vatican, published on July 20, 2026, a piece by Michelle La Rosa titled “Patron saints for digestive woes.” The article presents a lighthearted compendium of saints—St. Timothy, St. Teresa of Avila, St. Elmo, St. Bonaventure, St. Hildegard—reduced to celestial remedies for intestinal parasites allegedly linked to Taco Bell lettuce. It concludes with a scatological anecdote about the heresiarch Arius dying on a toilet, framed as a joke about denying the homoousios and a warning against iceberg lettuce. This trivialization of the Communion of Saints into a homeopathic pharmacy for “tummy trouble” exposes the utter spiritual bankruptcy of the post-conciliar neo-church.
Reduction of the Heavenly Court to a Naturalistic Pharmacy
The cited article relates that “The Pillar has compiled a list of saints whose intercession is commonly sought for… bowel problems… of various sorts.” This framing reveals the anthropocentric inversion at the heart of the conciliar revolution. The saints, whose ultima ratio is the glory of God and the salvation of souls (salus animarum suprema lex), are here deployed as functionaries for gastrointestinal comfort. St. Paul’s admonition to Timothy—”use a little wine for the sake of your stomach and your frequent ailments” (1 Tim 5:23)—is stripped of its ascetical context and presented as a scriptural endorsement for digestive self-care. The article asks whether “a little wine will help alleviate the… unpleasantness,” noting “(The FDA is strangely silent on that potential remedy).” This deferral to the Food and Drug Administration as a tacit authority on remedies manifests the laicism condemned by Pius XI: “When God and Jesus Christ… were removed from laws and states… the foundations of that authority were destroyed” (Quas Primas, 1925). The faithful are taught to look to the State’s bureaucratic agencies rather than to the Unbloody Sacrifice of Calvary and the sacramental order for healing of body and soul.
Scatological Rhetoric as Symptom of Liturgical and Theological Decay
The linguistic level of the article is saturated with scatological banality: “tummy trouble,” “evacuated,” “internal unrest,” “spastic gastric pangs,” “on the toilet.” This vocabulary is not incidental; it is the lex orandi of a church that has abandoned the lex credendi. St. Pius X warned in Lamentabili sane exitu (1907) that “the pursuit of novelty… leads to deplorable consequences, abandoning all restraint… particularly pernicious when they concern sacred sciences.” The listicle format itself—a product of the digital age’s attention economy—trivializes the Communio Sanctorum into clickbait. The description of St. Elmo’s martyrdom (“disemboweled, a fate at least as painful as parasite-induced… distress”) and Arius’s death (“struck by a sudden bout of… spastic gastric pangs… that were so intense he died, on the toilet, in a public restroom”) drags the martyr’s witness and the heresiarch’s divine judgment into the gutter of bathroom humor. This is the cult of man predicted by Pius XI: man becomes the measure, and the sacred is profaned to entertain the flesh.
Doctrinal Annihilation: Saints as Intercessors for Temporal Comfort Alone
The theological level reveals a complete silence on the supernatural order. Not a word is said of sin, grace, the state of the soul, the Last Rites, or the Most Holy Sacrifice as the source of all grace. St. Teresa of Avila’s sufferings are noted, but her “patient forbearance” is presented merely as a coping mechanism for “internal unrest,” not as a participation in the Cross for the redemption of souls. St. Hildegard’s herbal remedies—wormwood, spelt, fennel—are evaluated by the FDA’s standards (“classified by the FDA as unsafe for human consumption”), placing the secular state’s regulatory power above the Church’s traditional pharmacopeia and the wisdom of a Doctor of the Church. The Syllabus of Errors (1864) condemns the proposition that “the civil government… has a right to an indirect negative power over religious affairs” (Error 41) and that “the secular power has authority to… make enactments regarding the administration of the divine sacraments” (Error 44). Here, the FDA sits in judgment on the remedies of a saint, and the conciliar journalist submits.
Furthermore, the article’s treatment of St. Hildegard as a “Doctor of the Church” requires scrutiny. While St. Bonaventure was declared a Doctor by Sixtus V (1588), St. Teresa of Avila received this title from Paul VI (1970) and St. Hildegard from Benedict XVI (2012). Given the automatic loss of office for manifest heresy demonstrated by Bellarmine and Canon 188.4—”Publicly defects from the Catholic faith”—the post-1958 claimants to the papacy lack jurisdiction to confer such titles. Their “canonizations” and “doctorates” are null, void, and of no effect (Cum ex Apostolatus Officio). The article thus propagates the novelties of a usurping hierarchy.
The Arius Anecdote: Trivializing the Council of Nicaea and Divine Judgment
The inclusion of the “Not-a-Saint Arius” section is a blasphemous mockery of dogma. The article recounts the heresiarch’s death on a toilet as a cautionary tale: “Don’t deny the homoousios. And maybe avoid iceberg lettuce for another week or two.” The homoousios—the consubstantiality of the Son with the Father, defined at Nicaea (325) and defended by St. Athanasius against the world—is reduced to a punchline for a lettuce recall. The Council of Nicaea, which Pius XI in Quas Primas cites as the foundation of Christ’s Kingship (“this Council decreed… the Only-Begotten Son of God is consubstantial with the Father… confirmed the royal dignity of Christ the Lord”), is here invoked only to set up a scatological joke. This is the evolution of dogma into farce condemned by St. Pius X: “The dogmas which the Church proposes as revealed are not truths of divine origin but are a certain interpretation of religious facts” (Lamentabili, prop. 22). The neo-church treats the deposit of faith as material for content generation.
Systemic Apostasy: The Neo-Church as Abomination of Desolation
This article is not an aberration; it is the logical fruit of the conciliar revolution. The “Church of the New Advent,” having abandoned the Social Kingship of Christ (“His reign encompasses also all non-Christians… the entire human race is subject to the authority of Jesus Christ,” Quas Primas), has nothing left to offer but temporal palliatives. The Syllabus condemns the error that “the Catholic religion should be held as the only religion of the State, to the exclusion of all other forms of worship” (Error 77) and that “the Roman Pontiff can, and ought to, reconcile himself… with progress, liberalism and modern civilization” (Error 80). The Pillar, as a voice of the structures occupying the Vatican, embodies this reconciliation: it speaks the language of the CDC, the FDA, and the internet listicle. It offers the faithful idolatry of the temporal—parasites, lettuce recalls, and herbal tinctures—in place of the Unbloody Sacrifice and the certainty of salvation.
The true Church, extra quam nulla salus, endures in the faithful who cling to the immutable Tradition, the valid sacraments administered by bishops of the true apostolic succession, and the Most Holy Sacrifice that alone propitiates the Father. The conciliar sect’s “saints” are stripped of their majesty; its “doctors” are licensed by antipopes; its journalism is a sewer of naturalism. Let the faithful flee this abomination of desolation and cleave to the King of Kings whose Kingdom “shall not be corrupted” (Dan 7:14).
Source:
Patron saints for digestive woes (pillarcatholic.com)
Date: 20.07.2026